The number one question I get asked by men and women alike is "Why are you single?"
Had you asked me this yesterday I would have had this whole schpill (yes I said schpill) about how I am a 25 year old educated woman with this and that of my own and I am just not willing to settle. Blah, blah, blah and some more blah!
As I took some time out to read my Word tonight I began to read I Corinthians 11 and immediately realized the real reason why I am single. It is not at all that the reasons I have been giving have no validity. No. It is simply that I put emphasis on points that were not as relevant as others, or that I couldn't fully articulate what I wanted to express because I had not yet received full revelation.
One of the main reasons I gave for my being single is that I truly believe that "a woman's heart should be so focused on God that a man has to seek Him to find her" and that I just have not been meeting any men who are really checking for God like that. Then I read [I Cor. 11] verse 3. "The head of every man is Christ, the head of every woman is Man, and the head of Christ is God." (Pause if need be). Eureka! This is why I am single. I have yet to encounter a man that I am willing to follow and the God in me is not allowing me to settle.
All this time I have been wondering why it is that I like someone for a few months and then all-of-a-sudden I'm slightly disgusted by their presence? Why can't I make myself like this person because he seems nice? Why can't this guy handle me? (That's the favorite question because I am a firecracker and guys tend to get in their feelings about me quickly but I never feel that they can provide the dominance that my personality may require). Or maybe I am just too picky... I want this! I want that! I need a real man! All the while just giving myself the glory. What I failed to realize, and what this scripture made me understand, is that it is not at all about what I want! The greatest gift that we have from God is His spirit dwelling within us. Some people may call it a conscience but I know better. & honey, your spirit ain't no dummy!
My flesh says I want that man! Spirit already knows he is not the one for me but she's cool about it. She sits back and gives me a chance to come to that conclusion on my own. A couple months in and I still have not gotten my mind right. As a matter of fact I'm really feeling this guy now. Then all-of-a-sudden [out of nowhere], this same guy that I was just almost in love with, I cannot stand to be in his presence. Now I am sitting here wondering why I even liked him in the first place. (laughing to myself). I swear, the deeper I dive into the Word, the more I begin to understand myself.
So you wanna know why I am single? It is because I am not in charge of picking my helpmate. It is just that simple.
Just in case you want a few pointers to get into your spirit's good graces so you can get the man you've been dreaming about I will give you some:
1. Make Christ the head of your life.
2. Learn and understand your position in the kingdom.
3. Be confident with who you are in Him.
So I guess all this time I was right; just for the wrong reasons. I am too much for the men of this world! Only a man of God can handle me.
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